Super Rats!

Posted on October 1, 2003 in Creatures Strange

What is purported to be a hybrid between ordinary house rats and muskrats are pouring across Kyrgyzstan’s Dzhalal-Abad region faster than the spring Iraqi blitzkrieg.

The rats “are killing numerous farm birds, are damaging grape and corn crops, and have destroyed 14 hectares of grain in one of the districts. These rats can climb trees and are destroying apples, pears and other fruit. The rat invasion may also give rise to different epidemics,” parliament member Dooronbek Sadyrbayev told Interfax….The rats frequently attack people and young children are especially vulnerable….The rats are not susceptible to typical poisons.

Such ecological catastrophe sounds like a scenario out of a Michael Crichton novel. Will these super rats find a way into adjacent Central Asian Republics? Will they spread into Afghanistan and force Osama Bin Laden to flee, arm-in-arm, with the U.S. High Command? Will they spread into China, causing the population to take refuge on the islands of Macao and Hong Kong? What if they get to the United States? Will Californians and Texans flood across the Mexican border, becoming a problem for the Mexican government as they squat on land and take menial jobs from Mexican citizens?

Will George W. Bush be forced to abandon the War on Terriers for the War on Rats?

Time will tell….OUCH! I’VE BEEN ATTACKED! THEY’RE HERE!

–Oh, don’t worry. That’s just Boadicea giving me a love bite. Whew!