Too Much Information, Probably

Posted on November 7, 2003 in Hiking Neighborhood

I was walking along a stretch of the Live Oak Trail which runs from El Toro Road to a low peak from which the surrounding countryside is visible in a nearly 360 degree panorama. The trail runs through open meadows and a subdivision. I was in the midst of the subdivision when Nature called.

Let’s leave most of the details to your imagination. The only available place was behind a palm tree. I determined this after a rough survey. Behind the palm tree was a fenced off lot filled with olive trees and pines. A low rise shielded me from most of the houses. The tree covered me from the sight of the Montessori School at the base of the hill. Only one second story condominium had a view and there was apparently no one around.

As I set to my business, I thought I heard a door. I looked up to see the back of a woman’s head rushing off behind a eucalyptus. There was nothing to do but finish, so I just stared at the ground. I cleaned up with my biodegradeable toilet paper. I pulled my pants up and looked again towards the balcony. This time the face was there, an adult woman. It disappeared when I saw it. I just buried my mess under some gopher dirt and got out of there.

There is no bathroom along the entire length of this 3 mile trail, not at the trailhead, it’s midpoint, or the picnic area at the hilltop. You’d think the County of Orange would do something on behalf of the residents and the hikers.