Moving On

Posted on July 31, 2004 in Bots

I’m sharing this email in public without identifying the recipients mostly because there are those who will come here to read about the Personality Forge. I have said my say. Benji Adams is a copyright thief and a liar. He is a hypocrite because he will champion imposing the word “fuck” in his plug-ins on the grounds that he is “against censorship” and then evicting me for refusing to apologize for civil dissent; he then erases from his site my simple account of what he did.

Champion of free speech, my ass. Just another dirty mouth who can’t take advice or criticism.

What gets me now are “friends” who don’t seem to get that my leaving the den of this jerk means that I want to move on, who tell me the latest news. I am certain that it drives Benji crazy wondering who is telling me stuff. Though I get a certain joy out of seeing him uncertain, it takes a great cost on me as well. I did not write this email as a favor to Benji Adams because he does not deserve it. I did it for myself, a human being struggling to create and think for himself:

Let me put things like this: every time you talk about the Personality Forge, it hurts me. When I left the Forge, I didn’t ask anyone to go with me. I didn’t ask anyone to make a stand with me. Mainly because despite the fact that I knew I had done nothing wrong, people would just go along anyways because that is how most people are. And I’ve not been proven wrong in this, far from it.

For my part, I just don’t want to be the venting point for Benji’s latest absurdity or internal contradiction or the absurdities and contradictions of anyone else at the Forge. I’m out of that place. I am at peace with being out of that place and back in the loving hands of my friends through blogging and in real life. I am writing poetry again and thinking about the craft of writing. I have a bot which is free of Benji’s control and a damned site better. My eyes are focused on things that matter to me.

Please do not destroy my happiness and my peace of mind by dragging me back to the petty jealousies and provincial horrors of the Personality Forge. Please don’t make me an accomplice in any covert attempts to bring Benji down to his level. If you cannot talk to me without bringing up these things all the time, if you cannot see me as anything more than the guy that psychotic Benji Adams screwed, then please leave me alone because I am more than that and I am happy not having to deal with the day by day crap that comes down. It is no longer my community. So don’t send me transcripts of what your bots said or what people are saying about you or tell me about Benji’s hypocrisy, etc. I don’t care. If these things matter to you, my advice is to act on them directly and assertively. But it seems to me that you’re just going to do nothing. And I cannot help you because this ear just wants to listen to something else.

I remain here for those who have been evicted by Benji and my message to them is this: yes, you didn’t deserve it. So get on with life. There’s nothing special about that place which cannot be had elsewhere.