Insert a Trite Metaphor for a Corral #58

Posted on February 25, 2007 in Roundup

It seems that there is a plan to bomb Iran in the works as the still unfinished and unloved U.S. war in Iraq claims more casualties. This time there may really be weapons of mass destruction capable of making it into space. Let us not forget that this was the nation we secretly supported in an arms for hostages deal: they’ve got some of the best brains and best technology of any Middle Eastern nation.

Is it worth our while? Iran isn’t being cowed by our rumblings. The last time the U.S. began hitting on a country for weapons of mass destruction it didn’t have, that country was overrun. This time, Iran thinks it has learned a lesson that we didn’t mean to convey: HAVE the weapons of mass destruction so you can defend yourself.

For the first time since the Second World War there may be a power willing to use nuclear weapons. And our ships in the Persian Gulf — perhaps our cities — will be the targets.

• Lee and Davis Turn in Their Grave: Virginia has adopted a nonbinding resolution that expresses its sorrow for its role in the enslavement of hundreds of thousands of Africans. Never forget that though Robert E. Lee freed a few slaves in respect for the wishes of his bequeather, he took his ever-loving time about it (a matter of years — when Ulysses Grant was willed a slave, he freed him immediately) and fought for the nation which sought to preserve the “peculiar institution”.
• Vindication: I’ve often said that the only perfect people I know are perfect assholes and there is now a study to prove it.
• Ice on The Life: Another story about what is being discovered beneath the Antarctic ice cap as the shelves begin to melt.
• Less Safe: An Armenian church is reaching out to Iraqi Christians who have been targeted during the American “liberation” of Iraq. Things don’t seem to be better off for them than under Saddam Hussein.
• Space Cadets: Smoking Gun published a NASA memorandum describing what to do in case one of our astronauts goes crazy. In response to emergencies brought about by “acute psychosis” or suicidal behavior, astronauts are directed to restrain the patient with “gray tape around wrists, ankles, and use a bungee around the torso.” Additionally, if it is necessary to secure the astronaut’s head, a towel should be placed “under the neck and restrain with gray tape.” An oral tranquilizer (Haldol) is then to be administered. If the patient is uncooperative, an intramuscular injection of the drug is to be administered No mention is made of checking lithium stores. We probably won’t see any schizophrenic astronauts aloft, but I don’t doubt that a hypomanic bipolar could pass muster.

If you find any articles worthy of mention in these roundups, send the URL to gazissax at best dot com. And feel free to comment!