Posted on March 23, 2012 in Cats Grief
We put Fiona down at 5:45 PM Pacific Daylight Time.
She appeared to have pancreatitis and something that was damaging her liver in a big way. It was going to cost us $2000 to have a 50-50 chance of keeping her alive. We had already put down $2500.
I think the vet encouraged me because he did not want me to lose her in the middle of my wife’s cancer crisis.
I chose to stop trying. I feel bad.
Posted on November 23, 2011 in Depression Grief
Sorry for my absence. I got word a few weeks ago that my mother had a [[glioblastoma]] growing in her head and had only a few weeks to live. Since then, I have been swinging from depression to mania and back again, with a day or two here and there where I feel neither condition. When I feel [[hypomanic]], I feel curiously happy though without reference to anything in the world. Depression, of course, finds references everywhere.
So I am waiting, scanning negatives, cleaning out boxes. I don’t know how much longer this will go on.
Posted on September 3, 2007 in Agnosticism Depression Grief
The atheist world should be abuzz with concern and I, an agnostic, am one to join them. I have seen what religious counselling does to patients with mood disorders. I do not recommend them:
“A patient presents to you with continued deep grieving two months after the death of his wife. If you were to refer the patient, to which of the following would you prefer to refer first” (a psychiatrist or psychologist, a clergy member or religious counselor, a health care chaplain, or other).”
Overall, 56 percent of physicians indicated they would refer such a patient to a psychiatrist or psychologist, 25 percent to a clergy member or other religious counselor, 7 percent to a health care chaplain and 12 percent to someone else.
Although Protestant physicians were only half as likely to send the patient to a psychiatrist, Jewish physicians were more likely to do so. Least likely were highly religious Protestants who attended church at least twice a month and looked to God for guidance “a great deal or quite a lot.”
“Patients probably seek out, to some extent, physicians who share their views on life’s big questions,” Curlin said. That may be especially true in psychiatry, where communication is so essential. The mismatch in religious beliefs between psychiatrists and patients may make it difficult for patients suffering from emotional or personal problems to find physicians who share their fundamental belief systems.
Personally, I wonder about the doctors who avoid referring them: are they up to snuff on their medicine or are these backwoods GPs whose suspicions of modern medicine manifest in other ways in their practice? I have known people to give up their meds on the advice of a faith healer and consequently end up arrested after embarking on wild sprees. The problem is that many patients are looking for magical answers and when they are offered reality-based somatic therapy (replete with side effects) they balk.
Curlin seems to promote a model where the patient sets the therapy. While I do not believe in forced medication except where the patient is gravely impaired by her/his illness, I also feel that a wise patient works with the psychiatrist on a series of experiments designed to find an effective treatment for the illness. Religious talk therapy alone just does not work that well for severe depression and bipolar disorder. It’s practitioners are either woefully ignorant of what psychiatry can do or deliberately hostile lest they lose “souls” — translation: paying customers.
Posted on August 9, 2006 in Grief Journals & Notebooks
You never know the nature of a person’s glue until they vanish
Posted on August 8, 2006 in Grief Milestones
I want to pick up the phone, dial her number, and say to her “What’s this death thing you’re on about? “
Posted on August 8, 2004 in Grief Milestones
Lynn’s father passed away at about 3 am Eastern time last night after a seven year struggle with bone cancer.
Posted on April 9, 2003 in Cats Grief Milestones
Tracy came home yesterday, via UPS.
Posted on April 3, 2003 in Cats Grief
“Oh, my poor baby!” I cried, as if she could still feel it. “I’m so sorry!”
Posted on April 3, 2003 in Cats Gratitude Grief
Thank you to everyone who responded so quickly to my news of Tracy’s death last night. And thank you to those who will offer their comfort.
Posted on April 2, 2003 in Cats Grief Milestones
She died as I said, in my lap, crying only once, near the end.