Insert a Trite Metaphor for a Corral #42

Posted on January 30, 2007 in Roundup

Hundreds of thousands of people walk up and down the Capitol Mall. The next day, discussion about the war continue to reflect only the views of the pro-war crowd. Where the American people say the question is “whether or not”, policy-makers and pundits ask “How much?” Perhaps we should tell our congressional representatives not to watch television? There’s a campaign for the future.

• The century’s most compelling argument against the superiority of wealthy bloodlines, [[Paris Hilton]], filed a complaint against parisexposed.com. None-dare-call-her-an-actress Hilton hopes to stop the company from offering glimpses of the heiress’s home videos, medical records, and other possessions. Having heard and seen some of these, I can understand why she doesn’t want her vapidity known to the world.
• The rate of glacial meltdown is increasing. The BBC has charts and a series of pictures showing the retreat of one mountain glacier. But don’t let anyone tell you that there is such a thing as [[global climate change]]. It’s bad for business and, besides, pResident Bush does not believe in it. He can’t find it in his bible.
• Our eye on the heavens, the Hubble space telescope, shut down.
• An all-female contingent of peacekeepers has arrived in Liberia — from India. UN police advisor Mark Kroeker said “It sends a message to the post-conflict societies where we work that women officers can have any position and play any role in a police organisation.” Make a feminist happy: tell her about this.
• Greece isn’t forgetting the two hundred year old theft of the [[Elgin Marbles]] by Britain.
• Was Saturday’s march too tame? And should the demonstrators have dared to utter the word “impeachment“? It’s very clear to me that we’re not doing something right because politicians are not realizing that we don’t want the war but what, short of violence, is there for us to do? We need to think on these things.
• Bears in the Rockies are tense because of the lack of a canopy and food supply due to the mountain bark beetle infestation.
• Do you like to eat pasta that comes out of boxes festooned with little hares? Put the labels nose to nose with Kraft Instant Macaroni: “Annie’s has the same number of calories (Annie’s 270, Kraft 260), the same amount of sodium (Annie’s 550 mg, Kraft 580 mg), protein (Annie’s 10 g, Kraft 9 g) and fiber (Annie’s 1 g, Kraft 2 g), and a bit more fat (Annie’s 4.6 g, Kraft 2.5 g) and saturated fat (Annie’s 2.5 g, Kraft 1 g). But, you sputter, grasping at your last, best argument, “Annie’s is organic!” Not so fast, my friend. Only packages labeled organic are organic. Annie’s are labeled “totally natural,” which means, uh, which means … whatever you want it to mean, boys and girls!”
• White students at [[Clemson]] painted themselves black to “celebrate” [[Martin Luther King|Martin Luther King’s]] birthday. Is this conservatives’ dream the holiday’s future?
• Can you keep the queue moving in the game of Airport Security?
• What went wrong when Sealaunch blew up on the pad? I love how a press release merely states that “Sea Launch Experiences Anomaly during NSS-8 Launch“.

If you find any articles worthy of mention in these roundups, send the URL to gazissax at best dot com. And feel free to comment!