Ambrose B. Ambrogo 1993 to 2002

Posted on December 22, 2002 in Cats Grief Milestones

My poor boy. My poor little boy. He died of congestive heart failure tonight. We had him put to sleep. The odds of survival weren’t good and his life would have been miserable ever on even if we’d succeeded in bringing him through this episode.

I cried in his fur as I said goodbye. He was the best cat I’ve ever had — my best friend in an animal. I used to laugh and tell him that when they made a movie of my life, I wanted him listed as my Best Boy.

He licked me when we first met. He was too sick to do anything but cry when I said goodbye. “Ambrose, I said, when you get to God, tell him to stop the bad news. Tell Him I can’t take any more of this.”

He has become my personal saint, my intercessory. I arranged for his cremation. They will mail the ashes for me and I will mix them with my tears. Dammit God, we know you’re ready to take Tracy any day now and it would not surprise me if I walked into the bedroom and found her limp on the bed. But why? Why did you have to fuck me over like this?

Yeah, I’ll get through this. God’s saving me for worse tortures I am sure.

It would be so nice to be wrong. So nice.