Next: Survivor, Silicon Valley

Posted on December 19, 2002 in Satire

The last episode of Survivor plays tonight and, following a few days of postmortem dissections, the blogging world will go silent on this subject, Thank the Universe!

A sequel is in the works, I suppose, set in some far off national park which has not been encroached upon by subdivisions, coal mines, oil wells, or wood pulp processing plants. I doubt that anyone would last much in a Survivor: The Empty Quarter and Survivor: Siberia just doesn’t have enough tourist cachet. People may actually be getting bored with all these wilderness experiences, so I have a proposal: Survivor: Silicon (pronounced “Silly-Con”) Valley.

The tribe is dropped off in St. James Square, San Jose, California. They are stripped of their PDAS, personal day planners, Rolex watches, laptop computers, wallets, etc. They are clad simply in previously owned gym shorts and t-shirts. Not only must they find the good restaurant dumpsters, but they must cope with police harassment, yuppie scorn, and wealth-obsessed landlords who demand six months advance payment on tiny studio apartments starting at $2000 a month. (Two weeks into the series, the apartment they share will suddenly go condo and they will have to come up with the money or go back to the streets.)

Good luck!